The little things

Without the grand children around to share things with, I am beginning to learn to take pleasure in the little things.

Saturday, my mother-in-law had a “Mary Kay” party.  I don’t wear make-up….I don’t go out anywhere to wear make-up.  So it’s very rare for me to even buy any kind of make-up….But my niece is trying to make a little extra money, and she was the one selling the “Mary Kay”, plus my sister-in-law came with her and it was a chance for me to get out of the house with some adults for a few hours. 

She put on her little talk, the few of us that were there put on some of the make-up, and in the end I ended up spending a little money, that I probably shouldn’t have.  I bought a facial scrub and a light weight moisturizer that has sun screen in it. Everyone complimented me on the make-up, but it really wasn’t enough to make me feel “special”.  For $20 one should feel special!   We had a light lunch, and I was given some of the leftovers to carry home.  It’s just me and my middle son at home for the weekend so it will make for several meals.  Nothing special, chicken salad, hamburger buns and potato salad….

When I went home, I got back on the computer to view my facebook and see if there were any new “important” updates….Like something really important was going to happen in 2 hours…

I had posted some pictures of the new kitten and a friend asked if I was going to put a collar on it so if it got out, people would know where to look for it’s owners…My cats don’t wear collars in the house because I am always afraid they will get somewhere they shouldn’t be and get hung by them.  I think it’s fairly safe to say that the kitten won’t be doing that anytime soon. So I went looking through my “secret highly safe” storage spots….Only to find memories that needed to stay hidden as they just made me cry….my youngest grandson’s “wife beater” A-line t-shirt, my lost mini-pin’s t-shirt, and some assorted kids toys….Through the tears, I got back on the computer.

The only thing that really caught my eye was a web cam picture of the youngest grandson.  within a few minutes of viewing that picture, he must have turned the we cam on just for me….For there was a short (under 2 minute) video.  I saw all 3 grandsons, (well about half of the oldest from knee to chest) their 2 dogs and about the same portion of my daughter…with sound….The daughter was doing her usual; drinking sweet tea and yelling at the kids. But the important thing was, I saw the kids and heard their voices…I wish I could save that forever.

The little things….

I hear talking outside my window, and it turned out my brother and sister-in-law were next door installing a printer on my mother-in-law’s computer….Something she wanted and probably will need help in operating later.  She is connected to the internet thanks to my wireless connection, and needs help at least once a week because she “can’t” get on….because she never shuts her computer off….just lets it go to sleep mode.  But those in-laws have never made me welcome.  They live in town less than 2 miles away.  I don’t get invited over there, they don’t call to see if I need anything, and they rarely talk to me….unless they need something.  I’m better off without them.  I’ve lived here 9 years and can probably count on both hands how many times I have been to their house…and 3 of those times were graduations for which I took photos and gave them CD’s.  They don’t recognize my birthday or give presents for any occasion…but they are the “Chosen” ones….

I hope my grandson will send me more videos….

Until then, I will hold on to this one….

Then today I get on Facebook and see the youngest has posted a picture of him in a chair with his left foot bandaged and a pair of crutches.  Seams he tripped off his deck at home and sprained his ankle.  He said he’s keeping the crutches because they are “cool and fun”….typical boy!

 

Hugs and Love to all!!!

What happened??

My heart is breaking right now.

Before the “Big Move”, one of my grandsons had been coming over every single weekend for over 4 months.  Before he left, he promised me he would text me, write me or call me every day so I wouldn’t miss him.

He said he’d never forget me .

He has a Facebook page, or at least, he had one. 

I was sitting outside with my in-laws today who had brought over a printer for my mother-in-law.  It was an older 3-in-1 printer and after several times of installing, uninstalling, buying new cords and downloading updated drivers, my sister-in-law gave up and went out and bought a new printer….Much to my mother-in-law’s disapproval as she thinks no one should spend money on her….Hey! Spend it on me!!! I won’t say a word!!!!

My brother-in-law was busy going through photos albums looking for a “centuries” old photo of him one Halloween when he was a die hard “Gene Simmons/Kiss” fan. (Teenagers, what can I say….he’s over 40 now!!)

I visited with his 2 grandchildren who are friends of mine on some of the games I play on Facebook.   Then they bought Pizza for dinner and we all sat around on the porch chatting about different things, football, work, etc.  They finally went home around 9:30 p.m…..and I went to get on the computer.

I wanted to check on the grandkids to see what they had been doing…. and my grandson, who said he would make sure he talked to me every day was gone from my friends list.

I noticed his sister was on-line so I asked her if she would find out what happened.  I guess he has deleted his entire Facebook page…so I won’t be hearing from him, at least not that way….And we chatted/texted for a few minutes.  I told her I’d have the phones back on by next Friday and asked her if she still loved me….you never know these days with kids…Love you one minute, take away their cell phone and they hate you the next….Her answer was “Idk (text terminology for I don’t know), Is the sky still blue?”  so I guess that means yes…I told her it was kind of dark outside so I couldn’t tell….but she told me to wait until the morning to check…Hopefully the sky is not black tomorrow and we have a day as nice as today.

In the meantime, I miss everyone of them and wish they would all just send me a message once in awhile; whether it be e-mail, Facebook or whatever telling me that they missed me as much as I miss them…

I need my cell phone back on…..and Friday is almost a week away…..

Hugs and Love to all

(who are keeping me sane and cheering me up!!!)

 

Strays

Trouble comes in all size packages.

I could see trouble coming.

It all began several days ago when I went out on the porch to fetch the jar of sun tea I left out there to brew.  Two young ladies of about 10 years of age were riding their bicycles past the house.  One of them had a kitten of a few months of age cradled in her left arm as she rode. “Are you Tyree’s grandma?'” the other asked. I am very  proud to be able to answer yes to this question whenever I am recognized.

That’s when the trouble began.  The other young lady proceeded to tell me the sad story of how she found this “poor” kitten in her back yard and she had been trying to find a home for it. I asked if it was a boy or a girl and she replied “Girl”.  Having 3 adult male cats; 2 of them 6 years old and 1 of them 4 years old, I really didn’t want another cat….especially a female.  I’m over the “caring for newborns” stage of my life (Unless it’s a grand baby!). Then the young lady told me she was moving and had a male neutered cat with all his shots and they weren’t going to be able to take it with them….I didn’t want to break her heart but I really don’t need a 4th cat.

Over the years I have taken in my share of strays, from alligators to teenagers to sailors, and perhaps a portion of someone else’s. First it was my ex-husband bringing home first a puppy, then friends.  Then it was my husband bringing home single sailors.  Then my children brought home strays or pets they had earned cleaning out fish tanks at the pet store….and finally my grand children.  It was as if I had “S.P.C.A.” stamped on my forehead. I can’t even recall all of their names anymore. People just seamed to know that I would take in any strays if I could. 

Yesterday, my middle son and I went out to eat at Arby’s.  The younger son had the car, so we walked as we so often do. As we were leaving the restaurant, we could see this large black cloud coming in from the west and we just knew we were about to get rained on. I stopped anyway at the fabric store to see about some fusible web for my T-shirt quilt I am going to make.  As we were leaving the store, it started to sprinkle, but the drops were few and far between….until we got a few blocks closer to home. The trees along the side of the street sheltered us from getting totally soaked, and the rain soon let up as we turned down our street.

Then it happened.

The two of us became three….the third being the small black and white kitten from the day before, crying as it ran first ahead…then waiting for us to catch up.  It followed us right up the steps where it introduced itself to our male tom cat, Smokey.  Normally, Smokey is the first to chase any stray cats from “His” porch, but instead, he checked out this kitten and finding no reason to harm it, lay back down….This spells trouble….

The kitten would not come close enough for us to pick up and soon started back down the street.  One of the little girls from the day before had already spotted the kitten, and us trying to coax it to come closer.  Before I knew what was happening, I was holding this little bundle.  It was a male.  He was in sad shape…His fur was filthy and he smelled as if he’d been living in the sewer….but his little “motor”  made him feel as if he were shivering.

The rest is history….My heart melted and I took the little stranger inside.  I gave him a flea bath and he didn’t even make a big fuss about it.  I wrapped him in a thick towel and gently dried him off.  Then released him to investigate.   My Shih-Tzu checked him out…..My other gray cat Bandit definitely does not approve, as he hissed and spat at the intruder.  And Satan my black cat, who had adopted a previous litter of kittens (even though he is a neutered male) seamed to say, “I can live with it.” Before long, after cleaning himself and investigating a little, he found a warm spot on the couch to lay down and dry the rest of the way.  Before I knew it, he was curled up in a ball sleeping on the back of the chaise lounge near where I sat on the computer.

The true test was yet to come, as I was waiting for my younger son to come home so I could go grocery shopping….Out of the corner of his eye, he saw a flash of white dash by….”What the…..?”  I told him that Smokey had brought him in.  “Smokey, you have got to stop bringing home strays”, he said and went on packing for his visit south with his friend…NO fighting…..On his way out the door, he said “It’s either ‘The Kid’ or ‘J-Rock’ .”  The kitten has been named…..this means it’s not leaving…..

Even my 2 big “mean” pit bulls were curious.  They were instrumental in Satan adopting his previous litter as they somehow managed to find 4 kittens and bring them inside on their porch.  Daisy, the female, cried to see the kitten; then showered it with kisses.

And the bigger problem, he’s adopted me.  Do you know how hard it is to ignore a little “motor” when it’s sitting on your shoulder as you try to sleep? Or curled up in the crook between your arm and your torso?  Or how about when it’s sleeping on your pillow above your head with one paw gently on your face?

This morning, bright and early at 6:30 a.m., I was awaken by the soft pink nose of a gentle, purring kitten.  He sits on my lap as I try to type; demanding my attention. And he even tries to type, or plays with the string on my reading glasses.

Playful, smart, demanding…with an endless motor….He seams to be saying, “Thanks for loving me”.

playing with Satan

 

Hugs and Love to all!

 

P.S…..Does anyone know how to shut the motor off????

 

 

Oh No!!!

Don’t get excited!  Nothing bad happened….I just forgot to blog yesterday…and I have no excuse…I have at least 3 blogs I have been working on in the evenings.  I just simply forgot to edit and post one.

But Today is a whole new story,, I will at least get something written and post…although it may not really have a real subject matter….Just ramblings of a bored mind.

My son’s alarm clock woke me up today and I was a little upset…I was having a good dream where I was in my daughter’s home (I think anyway) and we were sharing a few laughs and the kids…I don’t know what else we were doing as I woke up in the middle!!! And you know how it is, you can go back to sleep, but the dream is never the same.

Anyway…My son has had this weird schedule all week…If you remember, (or did I tell you this??? there goes my mind again!) I got yelled at on Sunday because I didn’t know my son’s work schedule and he was over an hour late for work.  First of all, he is almost 28 years old….I shouldn’t have to tell him to get off the computer,  go to bed at a reasonable hour, set your alarm and get up on your own!  And when his schedule changes sometimes daily, how am I suppose to know if he doesn’t tell me!  Anyway, he usually doesn’t work Mondays or Tuesdays….But this week he worked both days….He usually goes to work at 3 p.m…..but for the past 2 days he has gone to work at 11 a.m…..He is usually off work around 9 and that hasn’t changed…he just always doesn’t come right home….with my car….I really don’t use the car anymore except on Fridays to go to the grocery store now…I know when he does get home, because my husband’s Chihuahua starts barking…whether he is covered up or not!

So I’m up early…which lately for me is 10 a.m…I lay down at 9 p.m., and turn the TV off after the news at 11, but my mind keeps me awake or restless at least until 3 a.m..

Last evening, getting rather bored with summer re-runs, I watched PBS and saw an episode if Jane Austen’s “Sense and Sensibility”.  For those of you who have never seen this; it is a charming story about  The ladies Dashwood; Elinor and Marianne and their romantic encounters….Charming people and sometimes a heart wrenching story as I have found myself wanting to slap a few of the characters….No I am hoping to catch the next episode, if I can find out when it airs next.

This morning, I played my usual games on the computer, then decided I had better try to get the grass cut while it wasn’t raining.  So I had to look for my shoes (after all it is summer and I go barefoot most of the time) and unlock the garage. I barely got through cutting the back yard when Mother Nature decided the grass needed watering.  So I trudged on in the rain hoping to get it all finished before the sky opened up and let loose it’s usual downpour.  That having been done, I cleaned the mower and put it away…unlike some of my male counterparts who just put it away without cleaning.

Now I am back to the computer.  And I think I have done pretty well on making something out of nothing.  Later when my middle son wakes up and before the youngest comes home from work, I think we will take off on a walk and go out somewhere to eat…Don’t get excited there either!!! It will probably just be a burger and fries.

So to all my friends, thanks for reading…I am in a fairly good mood today, but happiness is still out of reach…The promise from my grandson to keep in touch must rely on my cell phone being on…and I still have a week before I can restore the service.

Hugs and Love to all!

 

 

Wake UP!!!!

I had the hardest time getting out of bed today. 

The dogs woke me up to go out as usual, but I just went down, let them out and went back to bed.  I pulled the sheet up over my head and went back to sleep.  The sink is full of dishes again but I don’t even care.

Last night I turned the news off and lay down to try to sleep; but too many things were keeping me awake.  I really miss the grandkids.  I don’t hear from them with my phones off.  They don’t post anything to me on Facebook, or send me any e-mails.  Once in awhile I will see where they add a picture or comment to a friend.  It’s as if I don’t exist anymore to them; and that makes me sad.

It’s noon before I finally drag myself out of bed and go down to the computer. I haven’t even made a cup of coffee yet.  Food doesn’t interest me.  I check the mail box but I know even before I open it that there is nothing inside for me… My brother is visiting my Mom, so she won’t write until after he goes back home.  And no one else writes to me.  The check I have been hoping for never comes. I don’t even get something saying that I will get any of the settlement, and that’s discouraging. The extra money would come in handy to catch up bills and maybe even buy me a sewing machine to start work on a quilt I want to make.

Last night I was thinking about the July 4th parade and celebration coming up….and for the first time in 9 years, I have no one to go with.  So I may not even go to that. 

Nothing seems to make me happy anymore.

Football sign-ups have begun, and the conditioning will be the end of July.  The first practices will be August 1st.  But that all seems so far away now….and even now I am not sure if I want to go to those…It would give me something to do, but at the same time, it would make me sad.  I’d see all the kids and their families, and not have any of my own there to cheer on.  I know I would be welcome, but it would be hard to think of what I am missing.

I have tried to be up-beat, but it only lasts for so long.  I have tried knitting, but it only keeps me busy for a few minutes before it no longer interests me. 

Every night, I try to write something in my notebook by the bed….the beginnings of a new blog….my thoughts or feelings….and even that is getting harder to do.

And I read of all my friends and the things they are doing with children, grandchildren, friends and work…..Yet, I sit in my room watching rain fall or fighting to stay sane.  I just want to go back to sleep and dream…. 

Where’s the switch??

Did you ever go to your room at night and lie in your bed but just couldn’t seem to stop thinking about all the things that were running through your brain like a playful puppy?  Every time you stopped thinking about one thing, something else would pop up….Either a worry, or a bill or something you really “need” to do or should do?  Wouldn’t it be great if there was a switch you could just switch off long enough to get a peaceful, 8 hours of sleep?

Instead we lay there with our eyes closed and think "I need to go here…. pay this…. pick this up….check on this…call this person….write this person….”
And then there are the “what ifs?; the should of, could of, would of’s…….
If there was a switch we could shut off just long enough to get a full night’s sleep without thinking of all the things we do….Wow!  What a good night’s sleep we’d get! We would wake up refreshed.  Everything would seam so much better. We’d have a whole new outlook in the morning and though out the day.

The only problem I would see with this is some of us might just forget to turn the switch back on when we got up.We’d have to write ourselves a note and put it somewhere we would be sure to look….for me that would be the coffee pot…

“Note to self….
          Turn Brain switch on”

No problem …. whahhhh…..where is it???
After all as we grow older, I have found my memory is not what it used to be.  I have a habit of putting things away in a “safe” place- and then forgot where the “safe” place was…..This usually ends up bad; as I then tear the house apart trying to find what I was looking for, only to end up with a mess to clean up when I finally remember where it was afterwards.  I have often joked that  memory is part of a woman’s umbilical cord….with every child, you cut a little more away…(Thank goodness I am not like my grandmother who had 18 children!!)

There must be a switch somewhere.

I have ran into people who don’t seam to be using their brains at all….I often have heard the saying “Which line were you in when God was passing out the Brains?”….”Oh look a line, let’s get in it! I love train rides.”

You have your people who do dumb things that seam like fun, the fun things that end up being dumb and the things that are neither fun or safe and are just plain stupid.
Then there is the person behind the wheel of a car that has no clue…They don’t care what the sign says, what color the light is or who has the right of way…They just focus on getting somewhere in a hurry…Often times they fly past you only to be right beside you at the next light.  Or they don’t bother stopping for red lights or stop signs which usually ends up with a lot of screeching brakes from other drivers and people doing “police-like” maneuvers to keep from sending their cars to the great scrap yard in the sky.  These people definitely forgot to turn the switch back on.  Or maybe they have a remote switch and the batteries died….

Well, now that I’ve spent this much time thinking about something we don’t have yet, I think I’ll turn off my switch and go to sleep….If I can just remember where I put the remote to the TV….
Hugs and Love to all!!

Lost Friendships

A long time ago, I had a very good friend…

We met in second grade and we were inseparable all through elementary school.  We had so much in common.  We were kind of the outcasts.  We weren’t pretty or popular, but we made friends easily with others.  And we loved horses. We even played like we owned horses; naming each one and even making pedigrees for them.

We went to the same church.  We were in the choir and Youth Ministry together.  We were in Job’s Daughter (a Masonic group for young girls based on the book of JOB)  together.

(Not me, but what the Queen would look like)

We went on trips and saw Natural Bridge; short-sheeted beds, and once we were even blamed for putting dish soap in a motel fountain….but thank goodness our group didn’t do that!

We went to the library, the Mall and the beach together.  If you saw one of us, the other was right there, too. We went to Triple R Ranch together on Saturdays. We went to summer playground together at the school.

We went to the same High school together.  Back then, there were only 2 levels of school.  You went to Elementary school through the 7th grade, then High school from 8th through 12th grades.

We were kind of goofy. We would look at the cute guys and wish, but we could never talk to the ones we liked.  We would follow them, find out where they lived and walk past their house.  I guess nowadays, you would call that “Stalking”.  But we never did anything but look and hope they would notice us.

We were the wall flowers at the dances…unless it was “everyone on the dance floor”.  During the summers, we hung out at the Snack bar at the beach or the “Fooze Ball” hall. 

Man, we could play some fooze ball!  I loved to stand on one foot, stork like and “whip” anyone who would challenge me.

She joined the marching band; but I tried out for the Drill team just to be with her.  We had several other new friends from High school that always hung out together with us.  All summer, we practiced on the fields and hung out at Hardees, where all of us would go for lunch.  During the week we had practices.  Every Friday night was Football games.  There were trips and parades.

She was the first one to “chase” boys and have a “boyfriend”.  Later, when a cute typical “Bad” boy moved in next door, I found one, too. But I was the first one to get married.

And that’s when things changed….I moved with my husband and young son the year we were supposed to graduate together.  Later when my marriage broke up and I moved home, we started hanging out together again.  This time we were older, and we’d go to the bars…Chasing men…We were “groupies” of sort for a band called “Filthy McNasty and the Magical Mystery Band”.  After the bars closed, we go to breakfast or cruise the strip at the beach. 

And then she met her future husband.  The funny thing was, we already knew his Aunt from the restaurant where I worked. And then we started growing apart.  She hung out more with him, and didn’t have time for me anymore.  Her “best friend” became a girl we had met in High School. 

Her father died the summer before she married.  As a wedding present, I paid for her wedding photographer.  I didn’t get to go to her shower as I was working to support my 2 children.  And I felt a twinge of jealousy when she chose the other girl as her “Maid of Honor”.  How could she when we had known each other for over 10 years, and she had known this girl barely 5??  Instead, I was a bridesmaid…in a dress I had to pay for and couldn’t stand to look at.  And I caught the bouquet.

She never gave me a wedding present….for either of my marriages….no baby present for my 4 children.  Her husband and her decided pets were easier to raise than children; and so thy have none.

She called once, and we went out together for a ride.  She had heard an ex boyfriend worked in a hardware store and wanted to check him out again…

She’s been married 32 years now…I’ve been married 31….She lost not only both of his parents and his Aunt, but both of her parents as well.. It shocked me when I learned that her mother had lay in bed in her own home alone dead with only the dog there for 4 days.  My girlfriend lived no more than 2 miles away from her mother, but they didn’t even talk every day on the phone. Her family had always been like that….very private and each of the 4 of them had their own “domain” in the house where they retreated to between meals. She now lives in her childhood home.  Between selling the house they had bought as a couple and inheritance from 3 sides, they are part of the “well to do” families we could never be a part of as children.

I miss her friendship.

Thank goodness over the internet, I have been able to make more friends.

Hugs and Love to all!